Sade

The year was 1985. My middle school best friend, her sisters and me were waiting to see the #1 video on the countdown.  Then it was announced and the music began to play "no need to ask...he's a smooth operator..." We responded with a unified disappointed “Aw man!!!”.  I’m sure we were hoping to see Ready For The World or New Edition but nope, it was Sade. I think we watched for a few seconds and then headed out to the movie theater across the street from my friend’s neighborhood.

I didn’t appreciate that sort of music back then.  I mean I was a kid.  But fast-forward to 2011 as Helen Folasade Adu, the woman we know as Sade appears coming up from the ground at Philips Arena in Atlanta, lights low, with a slow stroll, the snare drum click-clacking clear as ever, as she sings “I’ve lost the use of my heart but I’m still alive…” I think, no I know, I had tears in my eyes.  Having gained experience, loved and loss, I now understand what she means.

This concert was the best I have ever been to.  It was emotionally moving, visually eye catching, musically OFF THE CHARTS, nostalgic as she sang songs that I have grown with and she looked AMAZING.  She was beautiful and ridiculously sexy although fully clothed; something music often lacks nowadays.  She sometimes wore an Audrey Hepburn inspired black top, ankle pants and flats, to a Irene Cara (via Sparkle) off-white gown with a hot pink peek-a-boo bra with bare feet and she closed the show in a candy apple red long sleeve dress. She oozed love, emotion, freshness, depth, pain and healing.  If you haven’t seen her live, please do.  This chick…I dig!

Check out this video from the concert.....she's SMOKIN'!!!

I Adore: BETHENNY FRANKEL

If you follow Bravo's Housewives franchise you've probably seen the Real Housewives of New York City and met Bethenny Frankel.  Although not a wife at the time, she was my favorite cast member on the show.  A single girl, trying to build her business, find love and befriend the wives.  She was hilarious, honest, to the point, fabulous, edgy, smart and came with a buncha baggage, and that's what won me over.  Although she was quite high strung and neurotic, she seemed like a real person.  Obviously she won others too, including Jason Hoppy (her boo), because she got her own show called Bethany Getting Married.  It followed her while she planned a wedding, honeymooned, all while pregnant.  But it didn't stop there. She got another show, Bethenny Ever After, and it's still going strong.  It gives a super invasive look into her life; marriage, motherhood, business and healing her past wounds.  She's ridiculously honest and I admire that about her.  My friend and I went to see her when she came to Atlanta on tour. For what?  Well, she's also authored books, is a healthy food chef, has a Skinnygirl Margarita and brand that has much more on the way.   She sat on stage and talked for a little more than an hour and wrapped it up with Q&A.  It was a great event.  She was inspiring, funny and beautiful.  She talked about her struggles with her family, diet, the Housewives and shared how she deals with and overcomes all of it.   

Why I dig her?

(As if what I've said already isn't enough.) She was the underdog on the show.  The outsider to this group of NY women with their husbands, children and "success".  But not anymore.  She sold Skinnygirl Margarita to a major liquor distributor, who initially ignored her when she first started with the idea, for an insane $100 million!! Talk about  TAKE DAT!!  I dig her because she didn't quit and she kept believing in herself.  Love showed up (in a wonderful man, a babygirl and extended family), and wealth showed up by her digging in and focusing on what she believed in;  an idea.  She made choices on her own terms....and life opened up.  She's a testament to what hard work and perseverance can bring.  Way to go Bethenny!!

Check out a recent article about her at Forbes.com. 

My Girls!

Just wrapped up another 9-week session for Girls Inc.  This time I worked with a group of 5th graders that participated last year for a different program.  I'm in love with them!! It was so cool to come back and see their growth.  They remembered a lot of what we discussed last year and it made this segment much easier to facilitate.  They are sponges, soaking it all up!

Sometimes I think I learn more from them than they did from me.  Kids are the greatest teachers!! 

But here are a few tidbits I wanted to share with parents/guardians (most of which you already know...I hope):

• They know more (or are at least curious) about more than you think.
• They talk to non-parents about stuff they think they're parents will disapprove of.
• Boys, sex, periods, bras, homosexuality are top subjects of interest.
• Your adult issues causes them great stress, yes "STRESS" is the word they used (parents fighting, jail, financial struggles, moving, divorce, death, more kids added to the family etc)

I urge parents/guardians to talk openly about these subjects.  Begin as early as possible because kids are TALKING and CURIOUS! (Not that they are actually doing anything.) Take away the taboo and fear. Equip them as needed so that the real world isn't such a shock to them.  Regardless of how much we hope to protect them they WILL encounter these subjects.  Better that they are EMPOWERED!

Making It Happen: Kantis Simmons

Check out my genius friend and mentor, author/motivational speaker Kantis Simmons featured in Inc. Magazine's December 2010/January 2011 issue with his mentor Josh Shipp.  I have an excerpt here but the article is a MUST read for you trailblazers out there.  Talk about phenomenal motivational speakers who happen to be great business men as well!!  Pick up a copy today!!

My Life In Haiti by Butterfly

Today I'm sharing a post from a fellow blogger, Butterfly, who also happens to be my personal trainer.  Well, that was until she left for Haiti.  Here's a behind the scene view of her trip that really moved me.  She made a choice even when things didn't look favorable and it's beautiful.  Check it out...

Written On:  Sunday:  July 25, 2010

Waiting on Me: "Tomorrow doesn’t envy Today, and Today doesn’t ask questions about Yesterday…because it knows its purpose..."

So that’s what I tell my daughter: Never wait!  Never wait for me… never wait on love.  Never wait to live.  Waiting is what causes anger, sadness, guilt, envy, and impatience. So, never wait…continue.  This trip that I am on… needed to be postponed------- for another time------ perhaps another person, and many would say, “Another place.” So why am I here? The adventure, the escape, the work or perhaps my instinctual, self-inflicted responsibility to uphold family tides.  I don’t know… those all sound good. But, I’d be fool to answer that today (8 days into the trip).  The answer will reveal itself…if I don’t get in the way.  Hell, the answer will find away, even if I do!  For now, I’m enjoying the nice sounds of cooing children and clucking chickens.  Good mornings that start at 5 and calm nights that darken at 7.  There is so much to do in a life…and standing still Has To Be one of the options.  Here in Haiti I am able to be actively lazy.  Doing my day-to-day activities don’t bring prosperity, but peace.

In a week Haiti has become my home and hope.  How is this possible?  Well, simple, there are no accommodations here.  You’re quickly swept into normal life, while you ride helmet free on a motorcycle in an open road with minimal signs and signals.  Normalcy kicks in somewhere between fetching water from the well to flushing your own toilet manually.   Hospitality is of most importance, so I can only giggle as I have breakfast with territorial roaches, greedy flies, and a curious mouse that walks around, freely, even while humans are around.  I don’t really know where I am, but there’s peace
every time I wake up and pronounce my name to the sun...with a smile.  I am on the roof…daily: Praying, reading, and journaling.  Looking down at the animals that get to rummage free, even if their final destiny be in someone’s kitchen table…the chickens and roosters, the pigs and hogs, the goats and cows, the cats and dogs, the donkeys and horses… are home, like me.